A Nigerian Woman Is A Woman on The Run

“Hey! Bia nne! You no dey hear word? Or until we shoot you abi?”
(Hey! Come, young lady! Do you not hear? Or, until we shoot you, right?)

February 2019: I set out for a regular morning run. It was past 0050 hours (WAT). Or, so I thought. Until I met with four men. Two of them had weapons — guns.

They were members of the vigilante group. One of them identified me as the lady who lived in the compound of Mr. X, my landlord. They asked that I go back home. It was too early for a morning run. Then I remembered. All my clocks had been set one-hour ahead of time. The time was actually past 0400 hours. It took me over one whole year, so step out again, after that event. Why?

Weeks before that encounter, I had heard of a young lady who escaped from “vigilante rapists” by jumping the fence, into someone’s compound. She sought refuge there until morning.

Now, how time and chance happens! I would later speak with a mentor on my interests in sports medicine and blood flow properties as a research area. Whilst sharing my “why”, she told me this same story. The house the young lady jumped into washers. The lady was a commercial sex worker who was returning home when she met with the vigilante team who wanted to take advantage of her.

I digress. Did I?

Well, last month, I set out for a 12-kilometre walk at about 0530hours. Seeing how dark it was, I hung around a street light until 5:48 am…

Five minutes into my walk, a young man came running behind me. The rest they say is history. I never do regular runs for speed. If there was one thing I took away from route marches way back in military school, it was endurance. But that day, I knew I had both endurance and speed. It was a sprint. A long sprint until I veered towards the bus parks.

So you see, being a Nigerian woman comes with fear of the unknown. You can tell women to take all the taekwondo classes, buy taser guns, pepper sprays, or learn the basics of weaponry.

You can even ask her to cover herself with “Mary-Amaka” kind of Blood of Jesus. The fear is still there! The fear of rapists!

We are constantly running from “co-runners and co-joggers”, from men, fathers, uncles, bosses, area boys, vigilante groups… A Nigerian woman is a woman on the run.

Men get raped too. We know. I know. You know. Very valid point, I must say.

But does a man increase his speed when he sees a woman running behind him?

I just have a question, please!

Where are the male models for young men and boys? We need them, NOW, more than ever. The era of the “bro code” and “boys will be boys” is no longer acceptable.

It’s not acceptable to tell women to learn to fight rapists, by dressing well, staying at home, using pepper sprays, tiny daggers and taser guns, for a crime that has only one solution: to stop rapists. These may seem to work well, until we start another war against the healthy interdependence of human sexes.

Here is what is enough:

• That MORE men become models and mentors
• That MORE men rise to the occasion in grooming young boys/men. If you are a man, we need you now. Begin with those around you.
• That MORE men call out this demonic behaviour, and not try to hide it like we hide medicines inside eba.

In the name of God who “…made them male and female alike”, Help us, please!

Thank you.

You are welcome!

Don’t mention it!

God bless you!

This “Mass” is now ended!

***

Mary-Amaka: a dressing style common with staunchNigerian Christian women, where women cover up from head to toe, or at least a long way below the knees. Usually assumed to be a mark of decency.

Eba: a staple food mainly eaten in the West African subregion, made from cassava.